We spent Sunday afternoon at a birthday party for one of my daughter’s very best friends. When I asked Lillian what we should buy as a gift, she replied instantly, “A headband and a magic wand.” (For anyone who needs to buy for a 5-year-old girl, now you no longer have to wonder what to give as a gift.)
Lillian talks a lot about magic. I tell her she’s magic all the time—that she can make things that didn’t exist before, whether that’s a drawing of a unicorn, a corn plant, or a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Or that when she smiles at someone or gives hugs, she makes that person happier than they were a minute ago.
“I’m a little bit magic, mommy, but unicorns and fairies are so magic.”
I tell her something is either magic or it’s not. And just the fact that you’re alive proves you are magic. Then we usually get into a detailed discussion about unicorns. But the seed is planted.
TRUTH: You always have the power to give yourself what you want, no magic wand required.
Sometimes you can create what you’re craving pretty much instantaneously. For example, a few weeks ago when it had rained for what felt like 10 days straight, I woke up cranky. “I just wanna take a bath!” my inner three-year-old whined. But it was a Tuesday, and the kids had to get fed, dressed, and taken to school. At first it seemed like that bath would have to wait. Then I remembered I was a grown-up, and grown-ups can do whatever they want (a fact I tell my daughter all the time). I got in the bath at 7 am. Sure, it wasn’t my most leisurely bath ever, but it was still awesome.
A lot of time what we truly want is love, and we always have that within us. Meaning, we don’t need someone else to bestow it upon us (no matter what Cosmo or 90% of the titles in the relationship section in the bookstore tell us). In that moment, taking a bath was a loving act.
Sometimes it takes a little longer to give yourself exactly what you need. When I talked with a client last summer, I asked her one of my favorite coaching questions: “If you could wave your magic wand and have the perfect work situation, what would it be?” And she said, “I’d stay home with the kids.” Three beats later, she said, “I can’t believe THAT just came out of my mouth!” It took a couple months for her to figure out exactly which assignments she’d bow out of and what she would say yes to so she’d make enough to make significantly lightened workload work. But she did it. And today, she’s in a totally different place. She’s freed herself from the need to feel like she’s kicking total butt in every single area of her life at the same time – at the cost of her health and sanity. She’s spent tons of quality time with the kids. And now a dream project, one she’d been trying to get off the ground for years, is taking off in a big way.
When you give yourself what you want, the universe follows your lead and starts giving you more of the same.
If you’re not sure what you’d use your magic wand for, or if you can hardly imagine saying what you want outloud (much less taking steps to make it so), join me on my no-strings teleclass, this Wednesday (as in, tomorrow!):
100% You: How Daring to Show Up Authentically Can Help You Find Love, Work, Health, and Happiness
Date: Wednesday, July 10
Time: 12:30 pm ET / 11:30 am CT / 10:30 am MT / 9:30 am PT
Duration: 30 minutes
Creating exactly what you want is soooooo magic!
