How Helping Others Can Help You Too

helping others

Helping others isn’t just a noble thing to do, or something to tick off on a list of things that make you a better person. It’s actually beneficial to you too, primarily because it gets you into a higher level of energy.

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When I say energy, I don’t mean energy as in what my grandmother would called “pep” or “get up and go.” I mean energy as in your vibration, or how you show up in the world. You know how you spend time with one person and they make you feel at ease, and another person and they make you feel down? That’s their energy. It affects you and the people you come in contact with.

This kind of energy may seem like something that happens on its own–you’ve either got good energy or you don’t, end of story. But you can absolutely do things to raise your energy.

Some of this you may have already intuitively experienced or understood

Maybe you’ve been in a bad mood and gone on a walk that helped you feel better. Or you were sad and you cried and then you saw things differently afterward. Or you felt blue and then you spent time with someone who helps you remember how lovable you are. Maybe you’ve meditated or done yoga or eaten a healthy meal and noticed that you felt better after. Those are all ways to raise your energy.

In my coaching training I learned about the seven levels of energy, which run from low to high. The three lowest energy levels are apathy, anger, and personal responsibility. These energy levels are all depleting–when you spend time in these energies, they will wear you down. The first energy level that starts to build you back up is energy level 4, and that is being of service.

Just quickly, before I talk more about helping others..

The other three higher energy levels are seeing the win-win in everything, believing that we are all always winning no matter what happens, and total bliss. I have an audio file I recorded that walks you through each of the levels of energy–how to identify which one you’re in and how to go about shifting into a higher level–if you’re interested in listening to that, email me at and put energy in the subject line and I will send it to you, for free!

OK, so back to being of service

Even just asking the question, how can I help?, shifts you out of feeling like there’s nothing you can do, or being angry that things are the way they are, or feeling like it’s all on you to figure everything out. You’re not focused on problems or injustices, you’re focused on making things better. You know the phrase, you’re either part of the problem or part of the solution? Being of service shifts you into being part of the solution, and that shift also raises your energy level so that you feel more inspired and upbeat.

Daily Tiny Assignment

Your tiny assignment then is to start experiencing the energy of being of service by making it your intention to help. This can be inside your own family and household or outside it, or both.

When you read a headline that is discouraging to you, instead of getting dejected or frustrated, think, how can I help? Maybe you could talk to someone you care about about the issue, and in that conversation you learn something new, or get an idea for a way you can get involved. Maybe you walk into the kitchen and see a sink full of dishes and instead of getting mad at your family or housemates, you can decide to do them, simply because they need doing. If you think of a friend who’s going through a hard time, maybe you decide to text them and let them know you’re thinking of them and ask how you could help.

I’ll talk more on Thursday about heading into a situation where you’re seeking to help with a clear intention, and how this can ensure that you are, actually helpful, but for right now, don’t worry too much about getting it right. Just do something to be helpful today, and when you do, notice how it makes you feel. Did your hopelessness recede for a bit? Did you forget for a little while at least what you were angry about? Or did you stop thinking about all the reasons why the situation was wrong and just get lost in the process of being helpful? Those are all positive movement in your energy level.

Again, if you’d like to learn more about the 7 levels of energy, email me

At kate at and I will send you an audio that walks you through them. Just put energy in the subject line so that I see it.

And tune in tomorrow when I’m talking about how to find ways to give back that are doable and a good fit for your life and talents.


Want to be a better person, but don’t know where to start?

My new daily podcast, How to Be a Better Person, is here to help by sharing one simple thing you can do in the next 24 hours to rise. My mission? To help you live your best life.

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