“I don’t know if it’s the homeopathic remedy I’m taking, or the restorative yoga I’ve been doing, or working with you, but I am feeling SO MUCH BETTER.”
As cool as it would be for me to be able to take 100% credit <cue Dr. Evil laughter>, the truth is, it’s everything she’s doing—including deciding to invest in and focus on herself.
When you are focusing on healing old stuff and creating new stuff, no one thing is going to create the results you’re after. It’s the combination of a few different things—whether related to each other or not—that really helps the dots connect and the pieces slide into place.
For example, one week I was talking with my coach about the habitual ways I stop myself when I’m on the verge of breaking through to a new level. A couple ideas came to mind right away, but it felt incomplete. Then, a few days later, I was working out with the personal trainer I see once a week. And boom, I saw how nearly every time I was trying to do something that was just out of my reach (pull-ups, anyone?), I would laugh. Not the “OMG that is so funny” genuine kind of laughter, but the “This is an awkward moment so I’m going to deflect your attention toward something else” fake kind of laughing.
If I hadn’t opened up my wallet and my calendar for both a coach and a trainer I would never have had that insight.
There is a really cool kind of alchemy that happens in your subconscious mind when you come at a challenge or a goal in a few different ways. Your particular mix of things-that-help-you-feel-better will be unique to you and will fluctuate over time.
I want to take a moment to answer the questions that might be floating through your mind right about now:
Isn’t it a little precious to pay for multiple things that help me feel better?
Is there really anything more important than your true happiness? Think of all the money you won’t need to spend on retail therapy. Or booze. Or ____________ (fill in your own blank.) Seriously.
In all honesty, do you want to feel a little better, or a lot? Own how much help you really need. Don’t simply sign up for the therapist that’s covered by your insurance and call it a day. You could go for 10 years and be in basically the same space. I know; I tried it!
I can hardly think about adding one new thing to my routine, how could I possibly do a few?
I hear you, I really do. If you’re at all prone to overwhelm, you’ve got to proceed with caution so you don’t wind up in shut-down mode. This is not about over-achieving. Or doing what you think you should be doing. Or doing something just because “the cool kids” are doing it.
Make your goal to select 2 or maybe 3 things that make you feel supported, that provide some sense of relief because at last you’re focusing on changing the stuff you don’t like so much. Trust that when you’re focusing on the important stuff—rather than ignoring it—you’re going to feel energized to the point that doing the work will feel much better than ignoring it.
How do I figure out what my perfect combo of ‘things’ is?
Go with what’s calling you—whether it’s acupuncture, coaching, nutritional counseling, Reiki, yoga, therapy, homeopathy, hobbies. Your particular mix doesn’t need to make sense to anyone but your gut.
Just use progress as your barometer of whether you’ve got the right mix. If something doesn’t feel like it’s moving your forward or expanding your horizons, it’s likely time to move on.
What’s in your magic mix of feel-better strategies? I’d love to hear about them in the comments below.